[We OPEN on Melissa’s room. Birds and crickets are chirping outside her window. She is recording a simple message for her readers.]

MELISSA: Hey, guys. Melissa here. Just… kinda testing this out, you know? Like… a voice reveal, I guess you could call it. It’s kind of a lead-up for what I’m planning for you guys. I don’t know how to describe it… ha, my voice sounds a little weird. I mean, it’s weird hearing my voice as I’m recording it. But… okay.

So. Darktober will be kicking off tomorrow, and it’ll only be as good as your participation. We’ll talk about your headcanons, favourite fics, all sort of stuff about Darkiplier. ‘Cos, the thing is, I know you guys like my posts… but I really wanna hear from you too. This is about us, the Markiplier fandom as a community, and sharing the love for everybody’s favourite Hellgod. Yeah?

[There’s a knock on the main door of her apartment.]

What was that?

[The knock occurs again.]

Ummm… guys. I don’t know who that is. I’m alone in my apartment right now, so I can’t imagine who’s decided to come and visit. Maybe it’s the next door neighbours? And what is that smell? Is that… sulfur? [sniffing] It’s kinda faint, but it’s there.

[The knocking occurs for a third time.]

Just… just give me a minute. I’ll probably delete this later anyway, and try again. Be right back.

[There’s the sound of a scuffle, followed by a light, eerie voice with a demonic echo reminiscent of Darkiplier Himself. It’s Meg who’s now talking to the audience, as Melissa is bound and gagged.]

MEG: Well, hello boys and girls. Daddy sends His regards. You know, I’m technically not supposed to be here, but shhh… I won’t tell if you won’t tell. [giggles] Now, from what I understand, there’s been a standing deal between the Old Man and your buddy here, just waiting for her to sign on the dotted line.

But Daddy’s growing impatient. He’s been watching her posts, just like you have, and He doesn’t take kindly to her tone when she talks about Him. You’d think such a brilliant lady would be smart enough to show more respect for a God. Really? That’s just not nice.

But anyway, I’m just here to give a little reminder that Daddy’s not gonna be kept waiting for much longer. He wants an answer, very soon. Maybe you could help her remember that, hmmm? See, Daddy only wants to help her, and how does she show her gratitude for His thoughtfulness? Mouthing off and spilling His little secrets. Tsk, tsk. Surely, her mama taught her better manners than that?

[to Melissa] You have until Saturday to make up your mind, sweetie. Then He’s coming for you. Oh, stop complaining, I haven’t done anything to you. Yet. Although, Daddy did mention if you were gonna be stubborn about it, you and I could have a lovely little playdate. [giggles] Oh, all right, I’ll untie you. See you this weekend!

[There’s muffled grunting sounds as Melissa removes the cloth gag for herself.]

MELISSA: Evil bitch. [deep breath] Okay. So what I was going to say, before I was so rudely interrupted by Daddy’s Little Psycho, is that Darktober is a go. And you guys can help me make it awesome. And, like I promised you, if you participate, I’ll be able to offer that up to Dark as a tribute in exchange for Him talking to you guys. Okay?

[sigh] Pray for me, though. Because I’ve got to face Him either way. But if I’ve got you guys on my side, I might be able to catch Him in a good mood. Maybe. Help a girl out here, okay? Love you all, and the first post is in the queue and will be out bright and early tomorrow morning.

See ya then!


Special thanks to @ellynore-moonwood for her amazing editing!


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Mostly, I write stuff. And, like the Egyptians and the Internet, I put cat pictures on my walls. Also, I can read your Tarot.