Lucien LaCroix vs. Aro di Volturi

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The last of the debate fic trilogy, and the shortest of the lot (because good things come in small packages). Written for the TwiSpiteFic comm on LJ. Contains spoilers for both Forever Knight and Twilight (well… kinda).

Aro di Volturi: I am called Aro, and I am the leader of the Volturi. Me and mine are the antagonists of the Twilight series. Carlisle used to be among our number for quite some time, and we allowed him to leave when he wished it. His lifestyle, curious though it is, is none of my concern.

Lucien LaCroix: I am Lucien LaCroix. Though my current name is French, well… let us just say that Pompeii would not have been the same without me. It was I who brought over Nicholas, the hero of Forever Knight, and I remain his greatest nemesis. I believe the boy is foolish to turn away from his true nature, and have followed him down the centuries to remind him that his incessant guilt and self-denial will only lead to a life of suffering.

Aro di Volturi: A pity, that. Perhaps if you give him time, he will see the error of his ways? We immortals have all the time in the world, after all.

Lucien LaCroix: You do not know Nicholas like I know Nicholas. Nor, indeed, do you know the ways of my world. That being said, I have, in this modern era, changed my tactics in winning back my son. And his manner towards me has softened somewhat–perhaps, all the more because he can no longer run to my daughter Janette for succor. It appears I have reinstated my presence in his life as the confidante he once had in Janette… which, the irony of it does not escape me. After centuries of avoiding me, he now comes to me for advice. One does indeed catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.

Aro di Volturi: Hmmm… Fascinating notion, isn’t it? Even we who are eternal must adapt. Your son does sound rather delightful; a fiery spirit that does not wane with time is truly rare among our kind. And one that protects the humans? How remarkable! I would rather like to meet him…

Lucien LaCroix: You will not. He is mine.

Aro di Volturi: Peace, friend. I am merely curious. I do so enjoy collecting histories and gaining new acquaintances.

Lucien LaCroix: Is that why you wait on disabusing the Cullens of the notion that they possess any real power? Or is it fear that they have a power that you cannot control?

Aro di Volturi: Hmmm… Well, their defenses are considerable, but not impregnable. That lovely dear Alice, who possesses the ability to see future events, has certain… blind spots. And Edward, though he is quite the mind-reader, can be easily diverted when one’s surface thoughts are innocent.

Lucien LaCroix: Then why do you not strike?

Aro di Volturi: I do regret that, in our time of guiding our species into the finer aspects of immortal life, that we have become rather… complacent. But you, my dear Lucien, you were a general in the Emperor’s army, were you not?

Lucien LaCroix: Indeed. I was.

Aro di Volturi: Then perhaps an association would be… mutually beneficial.

Lucien LaCroix: You believe so?

Aro di Volturi: Quite. Perhaps, if you were to join us…

Lucien LaCroix: No one is my master. After all, why serve any devil other than yourself?

Aro di Volturi: Agreed. But I ask you not to serve, but to consider an alliance. Perhaps we shall discuss the matter over refreshments?

Lucien LaCroix: I would be most delighted. And you have refreshments?

Aro di Volturi: Of course! After all, what manner of host would I be were I to not tend to my guests? I do hope you enjoy Chinese; we’ve ordered some for delivery.

Lucien LaCroix: Delivery? How ingenious! It’s been some time since I’ve had any fresh food. Rules being what they are, and all.

Aro di Volturi: Then you shall quite enjoy this meal, my friend. And, by all means, have your fill. ….Ah! I do believe I hear Heidi coming now with our dinner!



A few hours later… 

Carlisle Cullen: Aro, you vile betrayer!Aro di Volturi: *amused* Oh dear. Have we missed the latest episode of House, Carlisle?

Carlisle Cullen: Alice Saw what you’re planning.

Lucien LaCroix: *deadpan* Well, that was quick.

Carlisle Cullen: I cannot believe you! After all our years of friendship!

Aro di Volturi: My dear Carlisle, friendship is based on giving to one another. To quote a certain popular song, “What have you done for me lately?”

Lucien LaCroix: Yes. Do tell.

Carlisle Cullen: Did we not agree, upon our last meeting, to part as friends? You have seen that there is nothing wrong with Renesmee…

Lucien LaCroix: *stunned* Renesmee? What manner of creature is that?

Aro di Volturi: It is Edward and Bella’s half-human offspring, a lovely little girl with some rather interesting powers.

Lucien LaCroix: The poor child, to be cursed with such a ridiculous name.

Aro di Volturi: Indeed.

Carlisle Cullen: *frustrated that they’re not listening to him* Aro! You promised!

Lucien LaCroix: *to Carlisle* You bore me. *turns to Aro* May I?

Aro di Volturi: Please.

Lucien LaCroix: *rips Carlisle’s head off and sets the body on fire*

Aro di Volturi: *chuckles* I have a feeling Alice did not See that coming. *raises a glass full of blood left over from their Orgy of Death* To new friends?

Lucien LaCroix: *raises another glass* To new friends… and what we may do to further our friendship. *clinks his glass with Aro’s*

Well, that didn’t quite end the way I planned. But I guess that’s the kind of thing that happens when you put two Magnificent Bastards in one room together (movie!Aro feels like one to me… at least up until BD2).


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Mostly, I write stuff. And, like the Egyptians and the Internet, I put cat pictures on my walls. Also, I can read your Tarot.