One night before Glitchmas…

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Anti expresses his frustration about how Jack’s fans don’t take him seriously, and formulates a plot of revenge on the fandom… with a little love and support from his demonic father-figure.

Originally posted on Tumblr with this gif by marielgum:


[We OPEN on the Shadow Realm, the void between worlds, in Dark’s sitting room. Anti is pacing restlessly, as Dark nonchalantly files His nails.]

Anti [angrily]: “W̵h̸y̵ ̶w̷o̵u̵l̵d̸ ̸t̸h̶e̵y̶ ̴d̸o̵ ̴t̴h̷i̶s̶ ̵t̷o̵ ̸m̷e̸?̵!̶”

Dark: “Do what?

Anti: “H̴a̸v̵e̸ ̶Yo̶u̸ ̷S̴E̷E̵N̵ ̴t̸h̴e̶ ̸t̴h̵i̴n̵g̷s̸ ̵t̷h̴e̷y̵ ̵s̸a̶y̸ ̵a̷b̴o̷u̷t̸ ̴m̷e̵?̴ ̶T̷h̸e̴ ̷j̸o̵k̶e̷s̴,̵ ̵t̶h̸e̴ ̶‘̷G̸l̸i̷t̵c̸h̴ ̴B̷i̸t̴c̴h̵,̷’̴ ̸t̸h̸e̷ ̸b̵l̵o̵o̴d̵y̸ ̷M̵E̷M̶E̴S̷?̶!̶ ̷T̸h̴e̷y̵ ̴d̸o̴n̶’̸t̵ ̸t̴a̶k̵e̴ ̷m̶e̴ ̷s̴e̵r̴i̴o̵u̵s̸l̷y̵ ̷a̴t̶ ̸a̸l̶l̶!̵ ̷E̶v̶e̷n̵ ̵a̸f̵t̶e̵r̴ ̷I̵ ̸t̶o̵l̸d̵ ̷‘̶e̸m̷ ̷I̷ ̷w̴a̷s̷n̸’̵t̴ ̴h̶a̸v̵i̵n̷g̶ ̴i̶t̵!̸”

Dark: “My dear boy, don’t tell Me you haven’t seen the things that are also said about Me.

Anti [with a snort]: “Y̴e̶a̸h̸,̸ ̵B̴o̴s̸s̷,̴ ̴I̵ ̵h̴a̸v̷e̶.̵ ̸A̸n̴d̸ ̷I̸ ̸d̵o̶n̴’̶t̴ ̴k̶n̵o̴w̵ ̷h̷o̸w̵ ̷Y̸o̸u̶ ̴c̸a̷n̸ ̷b̷e̶ ̸s̶o̴ ̷f̵u̴c̸k̸i̸n̴g̸ ̴C̵A̵L̴M̶ ̸a̵b̴o̶u̶t̷ ̸i̴t̴!̴”

Dark [in a bored, been-there-done-that tone]: “I am calm because I know exactly what I am, regardless of what they have to say. And they know very little about Me. What they think they know is merely supposition and hypotheticals. They have no real proof one way or another.” [switches the nail file to the other hand] You are young yet. You will learn.

[Anti stops pacing and pays closer attention to his mentor.]

Dark: “The first lesson of warfare: ‘Know your enemy.’ They know much about you, and are able to use it against you. But they know little of Me, and so they cannot affect Me.

Anti: “S̸o̸,̵ ̸w̸h̵a̸t̵ ̷d̶o̷ ̵I̸ ̷d̵o̸?̵ ̸I̶ ̶c̵a̸n̴’̶t̷ ̴j̴u̴s̶t̴ ̶s̷i̶t̵ ̵h̴e̴r̵e̶ ̸a̷n̷d̴ ̵l̷e̷t̵ ̴t̶h̴e̵m̸ ̸l̶a̶u̷g̶h̶ ̴a̸t̵ ̶m̸e̸!̴ ̴I̴ ̸w̸a̶n̷t̴ ̵t̴o̷ ̴g̷u̴t̶ ̵‘̴e̴m̶ ̷a̶l̵l̴ ̷l̵i̷k̷e̷ ̶a̵ ̴b̶l̸o̶o̴d̴y̴ ̵f̶i̶s̶h̷!̴”

Dark: “My dear boy, any half-wit can terrorize a populace with a weapon. But causing chaos and damage without lifting a finger? That, My boy, is art.

[Dark tosses the nail file aside. Anti is now seriously considering His words.] 

Dark: “You are not the type to remain patient. They know this, and will expect you to lash out at them in short order. Let this work for you. Do something they will never expect.

Anti: “L̶i̶k̵e̸ ̵w̸h̸a̸t̴?̴”

Dark: “Make them wait. Let them know nothing. Then strike when they least suspect it. [leans forward, steepling His fingers] “They have made their choice to disregard you. So, show them that they chose wrong. Make them SUFFER.

Anti [grinning]: “I̷ ̸t̶h̷i̴n̵k̶ ̵I̶ ̴l̴i̶k̴e̶ ̴t̵h̵e̷ ̴s̴o̸u̵n̸d̶ ̷o̷f̸ ̷t̸h̷a̵t̶.̴”

Dark: “Consider the situation before you act. What do you know of them?

Anti: “I̸ ̸k̴n̵o̴w̸ ̷I̵ ̷w̵a̶s̸ ̵a̴b̴l̶e̷ ̸t̷o̷ ̴d̶r̷i̴v̵e̵ ̶t̶h̴e̶m̷ ̷c̷o̴m̶p̶l̴e̶t̴e̶l̶y̶ ̴b̵a̸r̸m̶y̷ ̴b̵y̸ ̶d̷r̷o̷p̸p̸i̴n̴g̶ ̶h̵i̶n̴t̵s̸.̶ ̷A̴n̶d̷ ̷t̴h̸e̷y̴ ̵g̸o̸t̴ ̴s̷o̷ ̴b̸l̶o̶o̷d̴y̵ ̷h̴y̴p̶e̴r̸ ̴a̶n̸d̸ ̸p̷a̶r̶a̴n̴o̵i̸d̶.̸ ̴I̴t̷ ̷w̵a̶s̷ ̴g̴l̵o̵r̷i̸o̴u̵s̴!̵”

Dark: “Now, consider if you gave no hint of your appearance.

Anti: “C̸o̶m̷e̶ ̷a̸g̷a̸i̷n̶?̵”

Dark: “Let them think they are safe. Lull them into a false sense of security. That you won’t be there, after all.

Anti: “T̷h̷e̶n̶.̸.̵.̸ ̴i̴n̷s̷t̴e̷a̴d̵ ̸o̸f̴ ̶a̸ ̴l̷o̷a̵d̵ ̵o̷f̸ ̸h̸i̶n̶t̸s̴,̷ ̸I̶ ̸c̵o̸u̴l̴d̴ ̶g̶i̴v̴e̴ ̵t̷h̸e̵m̶ ̴o̷n̸e̷ ̸t̷i̸n̴y̷ ̵o̸n̴e̶ ̴t̸h̷e̵ ̶n̷i̵g̵h̴t̷ ̷o̶f̷.̷ ̶J̷u̵s̴t̴ ̵a̶ ̷l̶i̷t̶t̵l̴e̴ ̸t̸w̷e̵a̷k̴ ̷t̵h̶a̶t̷ ̷s̵o̶m̸e̴t̸h̴i̵n̶g̶’̶s̶ ̷o̶f̵f̴.̵”

Dark: “And then, based on what you know of them, what will you do next?

Anti [pondering]: “T̴h̴e̷y̶’̵l̶l̵ ̷i̶m̵m̶e̷d̷i̵a̶t̸e̸l̴y̴ ̴s̵u̷s̴p̸e̵c̷t̵ ̵m̸e̶,̵ ̶b̵u̷t̶ ̷I̴ ̷c̷a̶n̵ ̵k̵e̵e̶p̶ ̴‘̴e̶m̵ ̶w̵a̶i̵t̴i̵n̵g̶.̵.̸.̷ ̷n̷o̴t̴ ̵k̴n̵o̷w̵i̶n̴g̶ ̸i̶f̵ ̶I̵’̸m̶ ̵g̷o̴n̵n̶a̸ ̵s̸h̴o̷w̵.̸ ̷T̷h̴e̴y̸ ̵l̴o̵s̴e̵ ̷s̴l̸e̸e̶p̶ ̶-̶-̷ ̶a̵n̴d̶ ̸t̷h̵e̵i̸r̶ ̷s̴a̸n̷i̷t̶y̵ ̵-̵-̵ ̵w̶h̵i̸l̷e̸ ̶w̵a̸i̸t̴i̷n̸g̷.̴”

Dark [with satisfaction]: “Now you are learning.

Anti: “I̶ ̷t̵h̶i̷n̶k̶ ̵I̵’̶m̸ ̶g̷e̴t̶t̶i̸n̸g̴ ̶i̶t̷,̸ ̸y̷e̷a̷h̵.̵”

Dark: “If you require assistance, I would be delighted to aid you.

Anti: “I̷ ̵a̵p̶p̵r̷e̶c̵i̸a̵t̷e̸ ̴i̷t̵,̵ ̶P̷o̸p̸s̷,̷ ̷b̶u̸t̵ ̴t̴h̵i̸s̴ ̵i̴s̷ ̴s̸o̷m̷e̵t̷h̴i̶n̸g̷ ̸I̴ ̸g̸o̵t̸t̵a̵ ̸d̴o̶ ̸o̴n̶ ̷m̸y̶ ̷o̴w̶n̸.̵”

Dark: “Very good. Now I think you are ready. Show them what you’re really made of.

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Last updated on: June 01, 2018

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Mostly, I write stuff. And, like the Egyptians and the Internet, I put cat pictures on my walls. Also, I can read your Tarot.